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pastelmimigt
Posts:347
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| 04/23/2008 6:53 PM |
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Edit 5/10/08:
I've updated this painting and it's the second painting below. Your critiques and comments are greatly appreciated! Thanks.
Michele
Original posting:
I need some help with this. I'm thinking I made this too busy, too much
detail and need to simplify. I'm thinking of taking out the mauve,
amber like bush on the left (just right of the pine tree) and then
extending the background grass/hill to the left. Then I'm not sure the
other bush just right of the center will look good by itself (plus
there's something about it I don't like right now). Also, I'm not sure
about the dark green grass in the foreground - both it's value (too
dark?) and the angle seems sharp. And then I wonder if the overall
values are correct and well-balanced. And finally, my focal point, well
isn't very focal. (Maybe after I make the changes above and any you
might suggest I'll find a better one). Funny, I really liked the
photograph I took this from and now I'm very unsure of the painting.
Anyway, aside from me being very wish-washy with my thoughts above - what do you guys think would help this painting? Thanks!
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micheletraum.com
"When I was young, I observed that nine out of ten things I did were failures. So I did ten times more work." -George Bernard Shaw |
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LovetoPastel
Posts:75
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| 04/23/2008 8:17 PM |
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Michelle,
I think the value of the forground grass IS too dark...but that might be the way it shows up on my computer. Right now, your eye is not led through out the painting. It immediately goes right to the lighter whiter patch on the creek. Even if the foreground grass is in the shadow, I'm thinking that there should be more details in it, but in blues and purples Maybe even a few of the gold/reds from the other grasses... or whatever colors you like to use in shadows... I don't think it has to be a lot... The angle doesnt bother me. I kind of like the other bush in there, but it depends on what you're after...then again it is very simular in shape to the backdound hill. Maybe you just need to alter its shape a little. Geee I'm sort of wishy washy myself! You've been doing great with your landscapes! Keep it up! I wish I could loosen up a bit... |
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Suzanne |
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085345n
Posts:56
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| 04/24/2008 1:39 PM |
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Hi Michelle,
I have to say that my very favorite part of the picture is the dark bluish grass and the surrounding water at the bottom of the picture, and I agree with Suzanne's that the angle is fine. I would like a touch of the purple/blue added to the grass in the distance, maybe where the water and grasses meet. Oh, well...that's my thoughts. Keep up the good work! |
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Kathy Knopf
My Fav: Psalm 139
http://picasaweb.google.com/PrettyInPastel |
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Crazywoman53
Posts:36
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| 04/25/2008 2:05 PM |
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Hi Michelle,
I think what is bothering you about your bushes is that they seem to be floating. They would naturally have more darker values at the base and the side where the sunlight hits would be your lightest value and the rest mid tones. Right now they appear to be all the same value. The edge of the bank on the left hand side along the creek should have some darker shadows as well but not as dark as you have the foreground shadows. If you have the means put this into a grey scale and you will see what I mean. I tried to post it for you but don't know how to insert a photo on your thread. I agree with the others about the foreground grasses.. I hope this helps some.. but try the value changes before you wipe out what you have.. I like it.. Keep enjoying it! |
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pastelmimigt
Posts:347
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| 05/10/2008 6:12 PM |
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I've updated this painting and attached it to my original message above.
Michele |
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micheletraum.com
"When I was young, I observed that nine out of ten things I did were failures. So I did ten times more work." -George Bernard Shaw |
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